What if?

With my xanga excursions into the great unknown, I've had my faith challenged/assaulted again and again...and again. And I won't lie, it made me question.
I have no problem with people knowing.
Because doubt can lead to critical thinking.
Questions are good. Always good.
Because when you listen to the assaults by logic and experience etc. it's like a hurricane coming by and beating your house into shambles.

How the heck can that be a good thing?
Well, because you either have to live in a heap of trash or you have rebuild. And in rebuilding you are able to make all the weak areas strong. Stronger than they were before. And you understand a little more about how your house functions and how you can maintain it and keep it from falling into shambles all on it's own later down the road.
That's what I've been working on. Today I went to the human trafficking awareness rally, which was something I hadn't done since undergrad, and was possibly something I never would have done again, had I not been actively looking for ways to "rebuild my house."

Well tonight I heard one of my favorite lyricists, Nichole Nordeman (I don't have favorite singers, because I could care less if they just stood there and recited their lyrics to no music), and I was like "Aha! Yes! That is how I feel!" (Which is often what she makes me do, which is why I love her). Even though I'd heard the song before, this time it made the connect:

What if you're right?
And he was just another nice guy
What if you're right?
What if it's true?
They say the cross will only make a fool of you
And what if it's true?

What if he takes his place in history
With all the prophets and the kings
Who taught us love and came in peace
But then the story ends
What then?

But what if you're wrong?
What if there's more?
What if there's hope we never dreamed of hoping for?
What if I jump?
And just close my eyes?
What if the arms that catch us, catch us by surprise?
What if He's more than enough?
What if it's love?

What if I dig?
Way down deeper than my simple-minded friends
What if I dig?
What if I find
A thousand more unanswered questions down inside
That's all I find?
What if they pick apart the logic
And begin to poke the holes
What if the crown of thorns is no more
Than folklore that must be told and retold?

But what if you're wrong?
What if there's more?
What if there's hope you never dreamed of hoping for?
What if you jump?
And just close your eyes?
What if the arms that catch you, catch you by surprise?
What if He's more than enough?
What if it's love?

You've been running as fast as you can
You've been looking for a place you can land for so long
But what if you're wrong?

--What If?