Ok, as per my previous entry, I don't do abortion debates anymore. What I do participate in is correcting people's dangerous though processes.
If you want to be pro-abortion, fine. I don't agree with you, but I'm not going to go over the finer points of biology with you or argue ethical stances. My entire career is biology and ethics and I just don't feel like getting down in the mud with you and wrestling over it. I have actual lives to go save, thanks.
What I can't stand, what I can't let go, is when people try to justify their stance by trying to define human life with standards of intelligence or being self-sufficient or physical capability.
Why? Because doing so ranks every human being on a continuum of more human to less human. And from that we get genocide. We get the holocaust, we get Rwanda, we get slavery, we get women getting acid dumped on them for daring to go to school.
Why can't we just narrow everything down to DNA? If you have individual distinct human DNA, you're a human. Plant DNA = plant. Crab DNA = crab. Treponema pallidum DNA = the syphilis bacteria.
For instance, one such person on ReveLife said:
"I would say yes a fetus is less human than I am. I can survive outside my mothers womb, I can breathe on my own, I live off nutrients that I feed to myself not that are fed to me through a tube. I don't share blood with my mother. I'm free to roam the world as I wish too, and have a fully developed brain."
Can't anyone other than me see the danger of such generalizations?
As I explained in my reply: "Ok, so say a four year old (or a 16 year old, your brain isn’t fully developed until the prefrontal cortex is finished, well into adulthood) is in the hospital, restricted to bed rest and unable to roam. They’re on a respirator, with a G-tube giving them nutrients, and several blood transfusions after an accident. They’re expected to recover in the next couple weeks. This is a very common scenario. Are they less human than you and me? Should I quit busting my butt and just let them die?"
Now, I'm not saying this person thinks my 4/16 year old isn't human. Or is less human. But they made a generalization that allows for that to be extrapolated.
And people may think that I'm extreme, or silly for thinking that we could wind up a society that thinks that way. Fine, whatever, chances are good we won't be around for either of us to be proven right. But you look at the things we, as a global society, allow to continue or justify and you know we didn't get here overnight. It happens little by little as we chip away at our consciences.
Or as we make rash generalizations all in a futile attempt to make ourselves look right.
WHY THE HECK DOES ANYONE CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF THEM??? Hmm?? If you're pro-abortion why do you go around trying to justify it? You should just be able to say, "Well, I'm right and it's legal so I don't need to explain it to anyone else." If you're anti-abortion you should be able to say "Well, I'm right and if they don't get it by now they never will."
Both sides have heard all the arguments and both sides think the other side is retarded.
And. It. Will. Never. Change.
Fight a battle you can win, people. Instead of continuing to say things that sound like you'd love to unplug a 4/16 year old fighting for their life or that you think sperm and eggs are people too.
(Oh, and if you use medical evidence to back up your point, make sure you know what the heck you're talking about. If I have to correct one more person on genetic disorders that are easily googled...)
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Hot Topic Buttons
If someone were to put out an announcement requesting volunteers to tell them why I'm not perfect, I'd be at the front of the list. And I'd have a list so long the rest of you wouldn't even be needed.
One of my biggest flaws in my inability to channel my passion in a productive way. Instead of being a steam-powered engine I'm just a giant pot of trapped steam that eventually explodes when one of my hot topic buttons get pushed. Luckily the buttons have gotten fewer over the years and they're usually rigged to only explode when fellow Christian poke them, but explode they still do.
And so, in the spirit of asking for trouble, my hot topic buttons:
1. Homosexuality and God. Yep, it's a sin. Yep, if you don't repent of your sins and accept Christ as your savior you're headed to hell along with anyone who ever lied, or rolled their eyes at their parents, or stuffed themselves at Thanksgiving, or looked the other way at a homeless person on the street. The point isn't the sin, it's that you couldn't stay perfect. No one can and we all have different weaknesses.
That said: the people who picket or shout at passerbys that they're going to hell (I've never seen anyone offer any hope [i1Peter 3:15] after such a scene) make me want to take their picket sign and beat them over the head with it. Seriously, if you ever wave your "God hates you" sign in my vicinity, you might want to make sure it's not attached to a stake that's gonna tempt me to go all Vampire Slayer on your backside.
2. The poor/homeless. Yes, they will always be with us, you will never end poverty. You'll probably never end AIDS either (it mutates more often than the Flu virus and you've seen how well we have that under control) but that doesn't mean we just line them up and send them to their deaths. And the majority of them have psychological issues, many of which have led them to substance abuse, but that doesn't mean you leave them hungry, cold and alone on the side of the road.
And if I hear you say "they should just get a job," be prepared for me to get you slobbering drunk and dump your butt off downtown after I take your ID, money, phone, and coat and cover you in mud. And you'll be thanking your lucky stars that I don't want my hands covered in rat feces...
3. Abortion. I don't think Roe v. Wade will ever be reversed. I know people on both sides who think it could be. I think they are silly and possibly brainwashed. I don't agree with people attacking girls and women outside clinics, I certainly do not advocate bombing clinics (hello! I knew that was wrong when I was 6 and heard about it the first time. Ingrates.), and I do not hate women who have had abortions. (I have issue with those who use it as their only form of birth control, but so do a lot of pro-choicers.)
However, to tell me I have to assist in performing an abortion? No. Do you really want me to give up my morals and ethics because you or a doctor told me to? Do you have any idea what that could lead to? The moment you give an inch in your ethics as a nurse, you might as well give them up completely because you've just set yourself up to be bullied into doing it again and again on different issues. Do you think the Nazi nurses agreed to go along with killing the Jews straight out? I bet they gave up little pieces of their consciences bit by bit along the way.
And to tell me I can't work in an ER if I won't assist in abortive surgeries? Are you serious? Do you not want me to pull over to the scene of your accident while you're bleeding to death either? You're ridiculous. There will always be a nurse in the ER willing to trade me patients. If there's not, that's not a cooperative hospital and I'm outie. So don't worry about your right to choose, you're still getting it.
And so am I.
4. Christians treating non-christians like dirt. (This should have a higher number.) Now, unless this person happens to be in the middle of a violent crime there's absolutely no reason to be nasty to them. "They were nasty first." Are you 6 years old? "They are blaspheming God." Yeah, well He's willing to forgive them, and you're supposed to be like Him. "They are offensive." And you're offending me, them and God, so get off it. "They need to be taught a lesson." What are you, the thought police? Please. "God said to!" God said nothing of the sort. What did you do, take a red pen and fill in some words of your own to the Sermon on the Mount?
5. Christians letting other Christians treat non-christians like dirt. Has no one read the continual commands to hold one another accountable? "Let he who has no sin cast the first stone"? That was about the religious officials (or Christians today).
There are more, but those are the biggies. The ones pushed most recently.
One of my biggest flaws in my inability to channel my passion in a productive way. Instead of being a steam-powered engine I'm just a giant pot of trapped steam that eventually explodes when one of my hot topic buttons get pushed. Luckily the buttons have gotten fewer over the years and they're usually rigged to only explode when fellow Christian poke them, but explode they still do.
And so, in the spirit of asking for trouble, my hot topic buttons:
1. Homosexuality and God. Yep, it's a sin. Yep, if you don't repent of your sins and accept Christ as your savior you're headed to hell along with anyone who ever lied, or rolled their eyes at their parents, or stuffed themselves at Thanksgiving, or looked the other way at a homeless person on the street. The point isn't the sin, it's that you couldn't stay perfect. No one can and we all have different weaknesses.
That said: the people who picket or shout at passerbys that they're going to hell (I've never seen anyone offer any hope [i1Peter 3:15] after such a scene) make me want to take their picket sign and beat them over the head with it. Seriously, if you ever wave your "God hates you" sign in my vicinity, you might want to make sure it's not attached to a stake that's gonna tempt me to go all Vampire Slayer on your backside.
2. The poor/homeless. Yes, they will always be with us, you will never end poverty. You'll probably never end AIDS either (it mutates more often than the Flu virus and you've seen how well we have that under control) but that doesn't mean we just line them up and send them to their deaths. And the majority of them have psychological issues, many of which have led them to substance abuse, but that doesn't mean you leave them hungry, cold and alone on the side of the road.
And if I hear you say "they should just get a job," be prepared for me to get you slobbering drunk and dump your butt off downtown after I take your ID, money, phone, and coat and cover you in mud. And you'll be thanking your lucky stars that I don't want my hands covered in rat feces...
3. Abortion. I don't think Roe v. Wade will ever be reversed. I know people on both sides who think it could be. I think they are silly and possibly brainwashed. I don't agree with people attacking girls and women outside clinics, I certainly do not advocate bombing clinics (hello! I knew that was wrong when I was 6 and heard about it the first time. Ingrates.), and I do not hate women who have had abortions. (I have issue with those who use it as their only form of birth control, but so do a lot of pro-choicers.)
However, to tell me I have to assist in performing an abortion? No. Do you really want me to give up my morals and ethics because you or a doctor told me to? Do you have any idea what that could lead to? The moment you give an inch in your ethics as a nurse, you might as well give them up completely because you've just set yourself up to be bullied into doing it again and again on different issues. Do you think the Nazi nurses agreed to go along with killing the Jews straight out? I bet they gave up little pieces of their consciences bit by bit along the way.
And to tell me I can't work in an ER if I won't assist in abortive surgeries? Are you serious? Do you not want me to pull over to the scene of your accident while you're bleeding to death either? You're ridiculous. There will always be a nurse in the ER willing to trade me patients. If there's not, that's not a cooperative hospital and I'm outie. So don't worry about your right to choose, you're still getting it.
And so am I.
4. Christians treating non-christians like dirt. (This should have a higher number.) Now, unless this person happens to be in the middle of a violent crime there's absolutely no reason to be nasty to them. "They were nasty first." Are you 6 years old? "They are blaspheming God." Yeah, well He's willing to forgive them, and you're supposed to be like Him. "They are offensive." And you're offending me, them and God, so get off it. "They need to be taught a lesson." What are you, the thought police? Please. "God said to!" God said nothing of the sort. What did you do, take a red pen and fill in some words of your own to the Sermon on the Mount?
5. Christians letting other Christians treat non-christians like dirt. Has no one read the continual commands to hold one another accountable? "Let he who has no sin cast the first stone"? That was about the religious officials (or Christians today).
There are more, but those are the biggies. The ones pushed most recently.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Fictional Characters
A friend of mine today said they wanted to talk about me instead of the fictional stories we usually discuss because they wanted to get to know what made me tick. Well the problem is, I don't know. I mean, do you know what makes you tick? Maybe you do. But I don't. What I do know about myself I learned from my fictional stories.
I think your favorite stories and favorite characters say a lot about you, so here's mine:
Stories: Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Harry Potter (esp. 7), Ted Dekker's Circle Trilogy, Twilight, Peter Pan, Anastasia, Ironman, Pride & Prejudice, Emma
Characters: Brooke Davis, Princess Anastasia, Arwen, Alice and Jasper Hale, Chuck Bass, Sawyer (Lost), Severus Snape, Addison Forbes Montgomery Shepherd (second season of GA), Barney Stinson, Jess Mariano,
Fairy Tales and Me
From the beginning: I always wanted the fairy tale. Not just any fairy tale, but the one where the Prince is in disguise as a stable boy and the Princess calls in love with him and doesn't think she can choose him because he's common but she does anyway and voila! Or the girl has that best friend who is always there, even while she's off chasing the popular guy until one day she realizes she's in love with the best friend, and voila! Or where the girl gets kidnapped by some foul man but has a bit of Stockholm syndrome and falls for him, feels guilty, but then finds out her original love was behind the whole thing to begin with and realizes "foul kidnapper man" is actually her perfect match, voila!
Happily ever after.
But I've deliberately manipulted situations to try and manufacture the fairy tale in the past and you can make it seem like the fairy tale, but you can never actually make them respond correctly...
And now. And now we have this friend of mine, spouting off all these tooty fruity romantic things that would probably be really appreciated by some girl, but that girl is not me. Because he's not my guy. And he doesn't seem to get that. Not only am I not attracted to him physically, but he's too desperate to get me to talk about me. Why is everyone like that? Why does everyone think if they ask the questions flat out, you'll just read like an open book? Does that ever work?
I want a guy who knows how to get the information he wants without asking point blank. Someone who realizes, without my telling him, that what I say about TV shows and books says far more about who I am than I'll ever admit.
Someone who sees my crushes on Sawyer and Barney and Chuck and Snape and Sylar as me being accepting of broken people. Not needing to fix them, being willing to just be them. Trusting that people can change and that people are not who they seem.
Who sees my obsession with vampires as my longing for an old fashioned guy. For chivalry and patience.
Who sees my fangirliness over Edmund as my gratefulness that we can be Edmund and still be the heroes in the story.
Who will read Ted Dekker just to find out what I believe about religion and why on earth I want a white bat and Twilight to see how I want to be treated.
Who understands that, complicated as I may be, I actually have books that can serve as manuals as to how I work and think, and will be humble enough to read them and adventurous enough to accept that, weird as it may be.
Someone who can figure this stuff out before me.
In short, I want someone who never asks me "What do you look for in a guy?" because they realize that I don't really look for anything in particular. That looks at the wide array of stories I love and realizes he doesn't have to go shirtless 24/7, or be a doctor, or have super powers, or sing. That in all actuality he could be a prick to most people, he could be a sap, he could be the most misunderstood person in our little world. But that what I don't want is someone who goes out of his way to impress me. Because I don't want to feel like I have to go out of my way to impress him.
I want to be who I am, and I want him to be who he is. Warts and all. Because that is the key to a good fairy tale.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Trivial Movie Entry #1
I just watched Wanted because
1. It has Angelina Jolie in it and she is awesome
2. It's one of the bebe seester's favorite movies
But it was dissappointing. At one point I found the story going waaaaaaaay too slowly, and Angie has such a small (though completely rocking) role.
The only thing I liked was the theme song, "The Little Things" by Danny Elfman.
Oh, and Angie's eye makeup.
Like I said, trivial.
1. It has Angelina Jolie in it and she is awesome
2. It's one of the bebe seester's favorite movies
But it was dissappointing. At one point I found the story going waaaaaaaay too slowly, and Angie has such a small (though completely rocking) role.
The only thing I liked was the theme song, "The Little Things" by Danny Elfman.
Oh, and Angie's eye makeup.
Like I said, trivial.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Lyrics blog!
Ok, I definitely blog too much sometimes. lol
All who sail the sea of faith
Find out before too long
How quickly blue skies can grow dark
And gentle winds grow strong
Suddenly fear is like white water
Pounding on the soul
Still we sail on knowing
That our Lord is in control
Sometimes He calms the storm
With a whispered "peace be still"
He can settle any sea
But it doesn't mean He will
Sometimes He holds us close
And lets the wind and waves go wild
Sometimes He calms the storm
And other times He calms His child
He has a reason for each trial
That we pass through in life
And though we're shaken
We cannot be pulled apart from Christ
No matter how the driving rain beats down
On those who hold to faith
A heart of trust will always
Be a quiet peaceful place
--Scott Kripayne
Personally, I prefer the bold part. I like the crazy depressing horrific parts of life. I like knowing there's a plan I can't see, that Someone is in control, that I'll be amazed on the other side. I like the calm in the middle of the storm. I fell in love with this song during The Breakup (yeah, probably doesn't need to be capitalized, but that way you know I mean the bad one without using names...since apparently that is illegal *rolls eyes*). I listen to it on repeat when I'm trying to go to sleep these days. Or when I'm about to lose it on ReveLife.
Speaking of ReveLife...
Which Jesus do you follow,
Which Jesus do you serve?
If Ephesians says to imitate Christ,
Why do you look so much like the world?
Cause My Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and liars,
He loved the poor and accosted the arrogant
So which one do you want to be?
Blessed are the poor in spirit,
or do we pray to blessed with with the wealth of this land?
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst for righteousness
Or do we ache for another taste of this world of shifting sands?
My Jesus bled and died for my sins
He spent His time with thieves and sluts and liars,
He loved the poor and accosted the rich,
So which one do you want to be
Who is this that You follow?
This picture of the American dream,
If Jesus was here would you walk right by on the other side,
Or fall down and worship at His holy feet?
Pretty blue eyes and curly brown hair and a clear complexion,
Is how you see Him as He dies for Your sins,
But the Word says He was battered and scarred
Or did you miss that part?
Sometimes I doubt we'd recognize Him
My Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and the least of these,
He loved the poor and accosted the comfortable,
So which one do you want to be,
Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church
The blood and dirt on His feet might stain the carpet,
But He reaches for the hurting and despises the proud
And,I think He'd prefer Beale St. to the stained glass crowd
And I know that He can hear me if I cry out loud
I want to be like my Jesus I want to be like my Jesus
I want to be like my Jesus I want to be like my Jesus
Not a posterchild for American prosperity,
but like my Jesus
You see I'm tired of living for success and popularity
I want to be like my Jesus
but I'm not sure what that means to be like You Jesus
Cause You said to live like You,
love like You but then You died for me
Can I be like You Jesus?
I wanna be like you Jesus
I wanna be Like my Jesus
--Todd Agnew
I play this one while posting on ReveLife sometimes. When it gets hard, and I have to remind myself who Jesus is. I fell in love with this song the first time I heard "My Jesus would never be accepted in my Church cuz the blood and dirt on His feet might stain the carpet." I was driving along (well, Sarah was driving, I was totally zoning out) and I looked at her and went "Ouch!" And she, in her characteristic Sarah-ness just looked at me and nodded slowly and decisively in agreement. I think I'd just been on my homeless trip and totally identified with all those things he talks about.
But my favorite line is the Beale street one, in case you didn't notice my banner. Because at CU New Orleans was like, the epitome of evil or something. When Katrina came through there were two girls on the treadmills in front of me and one of them said something along the lines of it was their fault for not leaving. I almost fell off my treadmill, making them turn and look at me. I was gaping at them, trying to regain balance. I spent the next 30 minutes glaring at them, letting my anger fuel my run. I wanted to dive at them and knock them off their high horse and smack them around for a while. I'd been to New Orleans. I'd seen the poverty. I knew people who probably didn't get out bc they couldn't afford it...well, their parents couldn't afford it. Yeah, kids.
So Beale St. holds a special place in my heart, just because it signifies New Orleans in general, and even more in general: the people other people don't want to bother with.
Well, news flash! There are people who can "stand" you. There are people who care about you. Care about your physical/emotional/spiritual health. There are people who don't find you "intolerable." There are people who defend you. There are people who would die for you.
Even if it's just me and Jesus. I'm ok with being a member of that club.
All who sail the sea of faith
Find out before too long
How quickly blue skies can grow dark
And gentle winds grow strong
Suddenly fear is like white water
Pounding on the soul
Still we sail on knowing
That our Lord is in control
Sometimes He calms the storm
With a whispered "peace be still"
He can settle any sea
But it doesn't mean He will
Sometimes He holds us close
And lets the wind and waves go wild
Sometimes He calms the storm
And other times He calms His child
He has a reason for each trial
That we pass through in life
And though we're shaken
We cannot be pulled apart from Christ
No matter how the driving rain beats down
On those who hold to faith
A heart of trust will always
Be a quiet peaceful place
--Scott Kripayne
Personally, I prefer the bold part. I like the crazy depressing horrific parts of life. I like knowing there's a plan I can't see, that Someone is in control, that I'll be amazed on the other side. I like the calm in the middle of the storm. I fell in love with this song during The Breakup (yeah, probably doesn't need to be capitalized, but that way you know I mean the bad one without using names...since apparently that is illegal *rolls eyes*). I listen to it on repeat when I'm trying to go to sleep these days. Or when I'm about to lose it on ReveLife.
Speaking of ReveLife...
Which Jesus do you follow,
Which Jesus do you serve?
If Ephesians says to imitate Christ,
Why do you look so much like the world?
Cause My Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and liars,
He loved the poor and accosted the arrogant
So which one do you want to be?
Blessed are the poor in spirit,
or do we pray to blessed with with the wealth of this land?
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst for righteousness
Or do we ache for another taste of this world of shifting sands?
My Jesus bled and died for my sins
He spent His time with thieves and sluts and liars,
He loved the poor and accosted the rich,
So which one do you want to be
Who is this that You follow?
This picture of the American dream,
If Jesus was here would you walk right by on the other side,
Or fall down and worship at His holy feet?
Pretty blue eyes and curly brown hair and a clear complexion,
Is how you see Him as He dies for Your sins,
But the Word says He was battered and scarred
Or did you miss that part?
Sometimes I doubt we'd recognize Him
My Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and the least of these,
He loved the poor and accosted the comfortable,
So which one do you want to be,
Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church
The blood and dirt on His feet might stain the carpet,
But He reaches for the hurting and despises the proud
And,I think He'd prefer Beale St. to the stained glass crowd
And I know that He can hear me if I cry out loud
I want to be like my Jesus I want to be like my Jesus
I want to be like my Jesus I want to be like my Jesus
Not a posterchild for American prosperity,
but like my Jesus
You see I'm tired of living for success and popularity
I want to be like my Jesus
but I'm not sure what that means to be like You Jesus
Cause You said to live like You,
love like You but then You died for me
Can I be like You Jesus?
I wanna be like you Jesus
I wanna be Like my Jesus
--Todd Agnew
I play this one while posting on ReveLife sometimes. When it gets hard, and I have to remind myself who Jesus is. I fell in love with this song the first time I heard "My Jesus would never be accepted in my Church cuz the blood and dirt on His feet might stain the carpet." I was driving along (well, Sarah was driving, I was totally zoning out) and I looked at her and went "Ouch!" And she, in her characteristic Sarah-ness just looked at me and nodded slowly and decisively in agreement. I think I'd just been on my homeless trip and totally identified with all those things he talks about.
But my favorite line is the Beale street one, in case you didn't notice my banner. Because at CU New Orleans was like, the epitome of evil or something. When Katrina came through there were two girls on the treadmills in front of me and one of them said something along the lines of it was their fault for not leaving. I almost fell off my treadmill, making them turn and look at me. I was gaping at them, trying to regain balance. I spent the next 30 minutes glaring at them, letting my anger fuel my run. I wanted to dive at them and knock them off their high horse and smack them around for a while. I'd been to New Orleans. I'd seen the poverty. I knew people who probably didn't get out bc they couldn't afford it...well, their parents couldn't afford it. Yeah, kids.
So Beale St. holds a special place in my heart, just because it signifies New Orleans in general, and even more in general: the people other people don't want to bother with.
Well, news flash! There are people who can "stand" you. There are people who care about you. Care about your physical/emotional/spiritual health. There are people who don't find you "intolerable." There are people who defend you. There are people who would die for you.
Even if it's just me and Jesus. I'm ok with being a member of that club.
Why bother?
http://www.revelife.com/revelife/690282510/the-bible-is-not-christian/?page=2&jump=1472011706&leftcmt=1#1472011706
So, being the masochist I am, I have continued to read and "dialogue" on the ReveLife xanga. And there is one girl who asked another "why bother" trying to explain anything to anyone.
Why bother?
Why bother?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!
I just about had a heart attack.
I wanted to respond but this is all I had: *crickets in the background*
Why bother?
Well, Matthew 28:19 comes to mind (Great commission). So does 1 Peter 3:15
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.
For, "Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."
Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. (1 Peter 3:8-18a)
Uh huh, and if Christ died, you can certainly handle the little picture icons who call you names online, far from any threat to your actual person.
Why bother. Oh gee, I don't know, because these are human being and ITS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to show an accurate depiction of Christ?
But that's just my opinion.
Oh, and God's.
(My cheesey pasta is cold now. *sigh* See what they do to me? Yep, it has nothing to do with my not being able to control myself. Nothing at all. :-P Gotta find me a microwave...)
So, being the masochist I am, I have continued to read and "dialogue" on the ReveLife xanga. And there is one girl who asked another "why bother" trying to explain anything to anyone.
Why bother?
Why bother?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!
I just about had a heart attack.
I wanted to respond but this is all I had: *crickets in the background*
Why bother?
Well, Matthew 28:19 comes to mind (Great commission). So does 1 Peter 3:15
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.
For, "Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."
Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. (1 Peter 3:8-18a)
Uh huh, and if Christ died, you can certainly handle the little picture icons who call you names online, far from any threat to your actual person.
Why bother. Oh gee, I don't know, because these are human being and ITS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to show an accurate depiction of Christ?
But that's just my opinion.
Oh, and God's.
(My cheesey pasta is cold now. *sigh* See what they do to me? Yep, it has nothing to do with my not being able to control myself. Nothing at all. :-P Gotta find me a microwave...)
How rich is too rich?
In today's culture no one can deny we are constantly bombarded with the message that we need more stuff. Newer stuff. Bigger stuff. Cars, televisions, clothes, houses, junk food.
At http://www.globalrichlist.com/ you can put in your annual salary and see how your incomes compares to the rest of the world.
Knowing that the second greatest commandment is to love others like we love ourselves, and there are others without food or even water, what does it mean to follow this commandment when you are so rich compared to the rest of the world?
I submitted this to ReveLife today in response to http://www.revelife.com/revelife/690174114/judgment-the-well-dressed-pastor-with-the-corvette-and-mansion/
We'll see what happens.
At http://www.globalrichlist.com/ you can put in your annual salary and see how your incomes compares to the rest of the world.
Knowing that the second greatest commandment is to love others like we love ourselves, and there are others without food or even water, what does it mean to follow this commandment when you are so rich compared to the rest of the world?
I submitted this to ReveLife today in response to http://www.revelife.com/revelife/690174114/judgment-the-well-dressed-pastor-with-the-corvette-and-mansion/
We'll see what happens.
I'm so bipolar it's not even funny
Somewhere in the mix of not getting any sleep the last week, skipping a weeks worth of yoga, seeing the things I see in clinicals, reading the things the moronic things they write on ReveLife, being reminded that American's don't care about anyone but themselves and that's how the rest of the world is always going to see us, and stupidly thinking I could take on the world..........I've exhausted myself.
I feel like I'm running on fumes and they too are almost gone.
Like the one time my car died on the highway and I knew it coming so I tried frantically to make it to exit but the more I stomped on the gas in my desperate attempt to make it to a safe stopping point, the more the car slowed down until I was positive I was going to be stranded in the far lane of traffic in Nashville.
That is how I feel.
I feel like I invited a whole bunch of people to come siphon off my gas, thinking that I could get to the next exit before I needed any..........and then found out there are no exits!!!!!! Anywhere!!!
I'm so exhausted.
I'm so tired of running around and around and trying to point out the atrocities going on and no one is listening. And the only people who ever hear anything I say want to tell me I'm a horrible person who obviously hates everyone and wants them all to die.
I mean, rights for women and children are my entire world. I fight tooth and nail for them. This has been a passion of mine for ten years! Almost half my lifetime. To be told I obviously have "no empathy" for my gender makes me want to simultaneously die and rip their face off. Figuratively, of course.
If I could find Jonah (from the Bible) I would wring his little neck and shake him and then beat him with his dead little tree for being so ungrateful when he was sent to people who listened to his message and changed their actions. Grrrrrrrrrrr. The fiend!
*attempts to clean up the word-vomit that just flew everywhere*
Ok, so not everyone hates me. But have you ever notices that it only takes one negative person to completely unbalance all the positive people? Why is that? Is that some ploy to make us ineffective at life or what?
Because I feel ineffective at life, that's for sure.
Ok I'm stopping now because I sound kind of like Jonah, and that is not allowed!
I feel like I'm running on fumes and they too are almost gone.
Like the one time my car died on the highway and I knew it coming so I tried frantically to make it to exit but the more I stomped on the gas in my desperate attempt to make it to a safe stopping point, the more the car slowed down until I was positive I was going to be stranded in the far lane of traffic in Nashville.
That is how I feel.
I feel like I invited a whole bunch of people to come siphon off my gas, thinking that I could get to the next exit before I needed any..........and then found out there are no exits!!!!!! Anywhere!!!
I'm so exhausted.
I'm so tired of running around and around and trying to point out the atrocities going on and no one is listening. And the only people who ever hear anything I say want to tell me I'm a horrible person who obviously hates everyone and wants them all to die.
I mean, rights for women and children are my entire world. I fight tooth and nail for them. This has been a passion of mine for ten years! Almost half my lifetime. To be told I obviously have "no empathy" for my gender makes me want to simultaneously die and rip their face off. Figuratively, of course.
If I could find Jonah (from the Bible) I would wring his little neck and shake him and then beat him with his dead little tree for being so ungrateful when he was sent to people who listened to his message and changed their actions. Grrrrrrrrrrr. The fiend!
*attempts to clean up the word-vomit that just flew everywhere*
Ok, so not everyone hates me. But have you ever notices that it only takes one negative person to completely unbalance all the positive people? Why is that? Is that some ploy to make us ineffective at life or what?
Because I feel ineffective at life, that's for sure.
Ok I'm stopping now because I sound kind of like Jonah, and that is not allowed!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I'm tired
I'd really like to rip apart Obama's speech but I won't because
1. I was recently reminded how childish that is
And 2. It is dang long! And boring. Like almost all political things.
I will say, though I threw up in my mouth a little at the "our founding fathers were AWESOME!" part. I think the entire point of these speeches is to make us think we are great. Like cheerleaders.
Anyway, I missed the inauguration (yeah, I'm broken up about it) because we had an IFH meeting for school.....which was also entirely pointless and boring, but at least it didn't take 160 million dollars.
Which brings me to the point of this entry: 160 MILLION DOLLARS?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!
First, where did that money come from?
Second, if Beyonce and Fifty Cent or whoever sang at this thing support him so much why didn't they do it for free?
Third, 160 MILLION DOLLARS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
I made a list, very quickly and mostly based on facts from Sarah MacLachlan's World on Fire music video, of exactly what that amount of money could do.
Rural clinic for 8,000 people (39,000)
Medicine for 10,000 people for 1 year (30,000)
Running a street children’s hospital in India for ten years (110,500)
Feeding 1000 street children in Calcutta 3 meals a day for 10 years (3,000,000)
Schooling for 1000 street children in Tanzania (25,000)
One deep well for each country in Africa (846,000)
Sending 10,000 girls to school for 5 years in Afganistan (1,724,137)
Training 1000 teachers in Afganistan (40,000)
Equipping 1000 classrooms in Afganistan (48,000)
Total cost of running an orphanage in South Africa (16,500)
Mobile Medical Unit vehicle providing medical treatment for the elderly (15,000)
Entertainment and escapsim for refugees (9,500)
100 former child soldiers to receive schooling and psychosocial support (5,000)
70 young people in Sierra Leone to receive job training (15,000)
Education, shelter and food for orphans in Ethiopia (500)
Malaria prevention for 1 million families (20,000,000)
A year of school for 500 orphans who lost their parents to AIDS (35,000)
A Hope Center in Swaziland (providing food, shelter, education, medical care, cutting child death rates by 50%) (15,435)
Safety for 1000 exploited children in Cambodia (100,000)
50 bicycle ambulances (13,000)
Nuts & bolts to secure houses of monsoon victims (500)
Irrigation for drought afflicted Sudan (1,050)
2 heifers, 2 goats, 2 sheep, 2 llamas, 4 goats, 1 buffalo, 1 pig, chicks and ducks (2,680)
This only comes to 25,330,402 -- which doesn’t even cover his train tour. We could do this more than 6 times.
Onstead, over 6 million people were directly negatively affected by us having a party instead.
Yes, please, Mr. President, sir, tell me how great and awesome we are and how we are lacking oh so very much and need more money.
These are the sort of things that make it so hard for me to keep my cool. And there's virtually nothing I can do about it because, like it or not, the government doesn't listen to us. And a letter to Obama saying such won't even get near his desk.
Ugh! It's disgusting.
I'm disowning America. ....again.
1. I was recently reminded how childish that is
And 2. It is dang long! And boring. Like almost all political things.
I will say, though I threw up in my mouth a little at the "our founding fathers were AWESOME!" part. I think the entire point of these speeches is to make us think we are great. Like cheerleaders.
Anyway, I missed the inauguration (yeah, I'm broken up about it) because we had an IFH meeting for school.....which was also entirely pointless and boring, but at least it didn't take 160 million dollars.
Which brings me to the point of this entry: 160 MILLION DOLLARS?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!
First, where did that money come from?
Second, if Beyonce and Fifty Cent or whoever sang at this thing support him so much why didn't they do it for free?
Third, 160 MILLION DOLLARS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
I made a list, very quickly and mostly based on facts from Sarah MacLachlan's World on Fire music video, of exactly what that amount of money could do.
Rural clinic for 8,000 people (39,000)
Medicine for 10,000 people for 1 year (30,000)
Running a street children’s hospital in India for ten years (110,500)
Feeding 1000 street children in Calcutta 3 meals a day for 10 years (3,000,000)
Schooling for 1000 street children in Tanzania (25,000)
One deep well for each country in Africa (846,000)
Sending 10,000 girls to school for 5 years in Afganistan (1,724,137)
Training 1000 teachers in Afganistan (40,000)
Equipping 1000 classrooms in Afganistan (48,000)
Total cost of running an orphanage in South Africa (16,500)
Mobile Medical Unit vehicle providing medical treatment for the elderly (15,000)
Entertainment and escapsim for refugees (9,500)
100 former child soldiers to receive schooling and psychosocial support (5,000)
70 young people in Sierra Leone to receive job training (15,000)
Education, shelter and food for orphans in Ethiopia (500)
Malaria prevention for 1 million families (20,000,000)
A year of school for 500 orphans who lost their parents to AIDS (35,000)
A Hope Center in Swaziland (providing food, shelter, education, medical care, cutting child death rates by 50%) (15,435)
Safety for 1000 exploited children in Cambodia (100,000)
50 bicycle ambulances (13,000)
Nuts & bolts to secure houses of monsoon victims (500)
Irrigation for drought afflicted Sudan (1,050)
2 heifers, 2 goats, 2 sheep, 2 llamas, 4 goats, 1 buffalo, 1 pig, chicks and ducks (2,680)
This only comes to 25,330,402 -- which doesn’t even cover his train tour. We could do this more than 6 times.
Onstead, over 6 million people were directly negatively affected by us having a party instead.
Yes, please, Mr. President, sir, tell me how great and awesome we are and how we are lacking oh so very much and need more money.
These are the sort of things that make it so hard for me to keep my cool. And there's virtually nothing I can do about it because, like it or not, the government doesn't listen to us. And a letter to Obama saying such won't even get near his desk.
Ugh! It's disgusting.
I'm disowning America. ....again.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Trivial TV entry #1
Sooooooooo. I'm catching on to One Tree Hill's tricks and I think Dan Scott's days are numbered because all of a sudden they're trying very very hard to make you like him, but in a way that's almost subtle. Like they did with Quentin right before they got him shot by the serial killer.
Sad.
:(
Also, I think OTH should end soon. Not this season, but next season. End with the Brook-Julian wedding being interrupted by Peyton going into labor and having the newest Baby Scott. They should go out with a bang, not wait for us to all lose interest. But obviously, I do want to see my Brooke Davis get her happy ending.
I love that girl!
End of triviality. Back to brooding. :)
Sad.
:(
Also, I think OTH should end soon. Not this season, but next season. End with the Brook-Julian wedding being interrupted by Peyton going into labor and having the newest Baby Scott. They should go out with a bang, not wait for us to all lose interest. But obviously, I do want to see my Brooke Davis get her happy ending.
I love that girl!
End of triviality. Back to brooding. :)
The American Dream
CNN: What are you hoping Barack Obama does for this country? What do you think is his most important task?
Chris Rock: You know, if you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money. That's it. I mean, it's like, what did Clinton do? We were at peace and we had a budget surplus. That's it. That's the gig. The closer you get us to those two goals, you know, that's pretty much the gig. Is that too much to ask for?
http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/01/19/chris.rock.kill.the.messenger/index.html?iref=mpstoryview
The American Dream: peace and money.
I think our problem is we're trying so hard to create heaven on earth. Which was never something Christ commanded or even alluded to. No, He said "in this world you will have trouble." He promised hard times. And we fight so hard to make Him a liar.
And I think this goes all the way back to our founding father and the pilgrims. In grade school we're taught that they were brave for coming all the way to the new world for religious freedom. That this was a huge accomplishment and we're eternally grateful for their sacrifices.
But if you think about it, they were really just running away. Their country was cracking down on them, they were being persecuted for their faith, and instead of banding together, winning their neighbors and changing their country from the inside out they ran away.
They ran and ran and ran until they came to a country without those laws. I might cut them a little slack if they had seen the Natives and immediately tried to win them to Christ but instead they cheated them, lied to them, took advantage of them, and ultimately killed them.
These are American heroes?
The Pilgrims should have been willing to die to reach their neighbors for Christ and instead they killed the Native Americans so they wouldn't have to (And/or stood by while others killed them).
The Apostles ran too. They ran toward persecution. Every single one of them were murdered for their faith except for John (and they tried to kill him too, but it didn't work).
"What’s the difference between a hero and a coward? Both are ordinary people, both are scared, and both are running. But the hero is running in the right direction." -- Brother Andrew, The Calling
And we are still trying to avoid dying for others: We're building walls and bombing our enemies to keep them out.
We're still letting others die to improve our own lives: We're ignoring poverty and crimes against humanity so we can spend the money on space research and public parks.
We're still running. But not in the race we're supposed to be.
Chris Rock: You know, if you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money. That's it. I mean, it's like, what did Clinton do? We were at peace and we had a budget surplus. That's it. That's the gig. The closer you get us to those two goals, you know, that's pretty much the gig. Is that too much to ask for?
http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/01/19/chris.rock.kill.the.messenger/index.html?iref=mpstoryview
The American Dream: peace and money.
I think our problem is we're trying so hard to create heaven on earth. Which was never something Christ commanded or even alluded to. No, He said "in this world you will have trouble." He promised hard times. And we fight so hard to make Him a liar.
And I think this goes all the way back to our founding father and the pilgrims. In grade school we're taught that they were brave for coming all the way to the new world for religious freedom. That this was a huge accomplishment and we're eternally grateful for their sacrifices.
But if you think about it, they were really just running away. Their country was cracking down on them, they were being persecuted for their faith, and instead of banding together, winning their neighbors and changing their country from the inside out they ran away.
They ran and ran and ran until they came to a country without those laws. I might cut them a little slack if they had seen the Natives and immediately tried to win them to Christ but instead they cheated them, lied to them, took advantage of them, and ultimately killed them.
These are American heroes?
The Pilgrims should have been willing to die to reach their neighbors for Christ and instead they killed the Native Americans so they wouldn't have to (And/or stood by while others killed them).
The Apostles ran too. They ran toward persecution. Every single one of them were murdered for their faith except for John (and they tried to kill him too, but it didn't work).
"What’s the difference between a hero and a coward? Both are ordinary people, both are scared, and both are running. But the hero is running in the right direction." -- Brother Andrew, The Calling
And we are still trying to avoid dying for others: We're building walls and bombing our enemies to keep them out.
We're still letting others die to improve our own lives: We're ignoring poverty and crimes against humanity so we can spend the money on space research and public parks.
We're still running. But not in the race we're supposed to be.
I am very excited
I just learned that Steve Saint's kids (Shaun, Jaime and Stephenie) all attended UF.
And Shaun was a med student.
Which means he was at Shands.
Which means I walk the same halls, push the same elevator buttons and touch the same handles as Nate Saint's grandson!
...which makes me sound a little weird, but "the yellow plane missionaries" (as I called them when I was 7 and still didn't completely realize they really existed) had a huge impact on my life.
...which also makes me sounds weird.
Never mind. Just trust me, it is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay cool!
And Shaun was a med student.
Which means he was at Shands.
Which means I walk the same halls, push the same elevator buttons and touch the same handles as Nate Saint's grandson!
...which makes me sound a little weird, but "the yellow plane missionaries" (as I called them when I was 7 and still didn't completely realize they really existed) had a huge impact on my life.
...which also makes me sounds weird.
Never mind. Just trust me, it is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay cool!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Dear Mr. President-to-be
I wrote this like 3 different times and it was just so verbose so here's the bullet points. If you just want the main message, skip to #4.
EDIT: In fact, just go to 4, the rest is just me complaining.
I've re-evaluated why I dislike Obama because I usually only feel this kind of animosity towards the "God hates f**s" crowd and child molesters. Basically I decided I don't care if he leads us into communism or fascism or caterpillar-economics. ("...capitalism is not a good alternative to Communism if the King of Glory is not invited." -- Brother Andrew)
And I don't dislike him for his stance on abortion any more than I dislike anyone else for that sole reason. So here's why:
1. He's cocky and it's annoying. He lets people compare him to Jesus (!!!) and accepts all this praise and adoration when he hasn't done anything to earn it.
2. His followers annoy me too because these are people who are just clamoring for "Change!" solely because they're lives took a downturn, though they didn't give a rats butt about poor people 5 years ago.
3. Change. Change? Yeah, I'd love it if this country changed, but what kind are we talking about here? Are we talking about a sudden cultural shift where suddenly everyone cares about the less fortunate and loves one another, giving their time and energy to make the whole WORLD a better place? Or change where Americans are making a ton more money so they can afford the latest DVR?
The last time we were promised change was with Women's Suffrage and I feel like that made being a woman a lot tougher in a lot of ways, so forgive me my skepticism.
Here's the biggie:
4. He's perpetuating the idea that we, as Americans, need more, deserve more. I don't care how poor you are, if you live in the States you are DARNED lucky.
You may not have easy access to healthcare, but you're living in a nation that has been vaccinated against most the diseases that would kill you and/or your children before they reached toddlerhood.
You have clean drinking water, even if it's only at public water fountains.
There is no one hunting you down with machine guns because you don't follow their religious beliefs. There is no one tearing your 5 year old out of your arms and making him shoot you with their guns so that he can be made into a good soldier for their army.
It's not the norm to be gang raped or have your genitals mutilated before puberty.
Nowhere are you at risk for stepping on a hidden land mine and losing limbs or life.
Education is FREE and available to EVERYONE. You won't even have to walk 10 miles across a desert.
Forced prostitution and child labor are illegal.
Lions, tigers, gorillas, hippos, cheetahs, elephants: unless you're at a zoo at an inopportune time you don't have to worry about them killing you.
The government can afford to keep West Nile, Ebola, Bird Flu etc. away from you.
If you think those aren't a HUGE deal, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
If you think you deserve any better, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
We can't afford for the leader of the richest, free-est people in the world to support the idea that we deserve more.
We can't! The world can't! It needs our help! It doesn't need us to redistribute the wealth among ourselves! Please! That's like the Sheik making his sons share their inheritance equally while their people die in the gutter!
How can we complain about our problems when the rest of the world has real problems?
That's why I can't get excited about this. Why? What are we excited about? I don't get it.
Are we really just a bunch of lemmings, doing the popular thing?
Is America a giant high school?
"No one have ever become poor by giving." --Anne Frank
EDIT: In fact, just go to 4, the rest is just me complaining.
And I don't dislike him for his stance on abortion any more than I dislike anyone else for that sole reason. So here's why:
1. He's cocky and it's annoying. He lets people compare him to Jesus (!!!) and accepts all this praise and adoration when he hasn't done anything to earn it.
2. His followers annoy me too because these are people who are just clamoring for "Change!" solely because they're lives took a downturn, though they didn't give a rats butt about poor people 5 years ago.
3. Change. Change? Yeah, I'd love it if this country changed, but what kind are we talking about here? Are we talking about a sudden cultural shift where suddenly everyone cares about the less fortunate and loves one another, giving their time and energy to make the whole WORLD a better place? Or change where Americans are making a ton more money so they can afford the latest DVR?
The last time we were promised change was with Women's Suffrage and I feel like that made being a woman a lot tougher in a lot of ways, so forgive me my skepticism.
Here's the biggie:
4. He's perpetuating the idea that we, as Americans, need more, deserve more. I don't care how poor you are, if you live in the States you are DARNED lucky.
You may not have easy access to healthcare, but you're living in a nation that has been vaccinated against most the diseases that would kill you and/or your children before they reached toddlerhood.
You have clean drinking water, even if it's only at public water fountains.
There is no one hunting you down with machine guns because you don't follow their religious beliefs. There is no one tearing your 5 year old out of your arms and making him shoot you with their guns so that he can be made into a good soldier for their army.
It's not the norm to be gang raped or have your genitals mutilated before puberty.
Nowhere are you at risk for stepping on a hidden land mine and losing limbs or life.
Education is FREE and available to EVERYONE. You won't even have to walk 10 miles across a desert.
Forced prostitution and child labor are illegal.
Lions, tigers, gorillas, hippos, cheetahs, elephants: unless you're at a zoo at an inopportune time you don't have to worry about them killing you.
The government can afford to keep West Nile, Ebola, Bird Flu etc. away from you.
If you think those aren't a HUGE deal, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
If you think you deserve any better, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
We can't afford for the leader of the richest, free-est people in the world to support the idea that we deserve more.
We can't! The world can't! It needs our help! It doesn't need us to redistribute the wealth among ourselves! Please! That's like the Sheik making his sons share their inheritance equally while their people die in the gutter!
How can we complain about our problems when the rest of the world has real problems?
That's why I can't get excited about this. Why? What are we excited about? I don't get it.
Are we really just a bunch of lemmings, doing the popular thing?
Is America a giant high school?
"No one have ever become poor by giving." --Anne Frank
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Why ReveLife drives me nuts
"A tiny group of believers who have the gospel keep mumbling it over and over to themselves. Meanwhile, millions who have never heard it once fall into the flames of eternal hell without ever hearing the salvation story." –K.P. Yohannan
I couldn't help but think of this quote as I read the comments on a recent ReveLife article. The exact problems I was talking about last night kept cropping up.
You had two Christians arguing vehemently about whether Donald Miller was a Christian. Two more arguing over whether the inquisitions were targeted at just Christians or not, and whether or not the Crusades were justified. Several Christians were arguing rudely with non-Christians about whether or not anyone can know anything for certain.
And if you visited these people's own xangas you find comments from people from the original discussion like "You drink, swear, and have tattoos, are you sure you're a Christian?"
But probably my least favorite was a response from someone about whether we're living in the end times. They argued that we couldn't possibly be living in the end times because life was worse in WWII when everyone was killing everyone else and our biggest problem today is having enough money for a pizza party.
SERIOUSLY!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?
A pizza party is our perceived biggest problem? Not the ongoing civil wars in Africa, access to clean (or even just drinkable) water, AIDS, grain shortage, lack of adequate medical care, forced prostitution rings, child brides, slavery, terrorism all over the globe, deteriorating economic stability, the rise in orphans, the increasing number of natural disasters, culturally required genital mutilation, racism, sexism, child and spousal abuse, new developing viruses....
And those are just the ones I can come up with off the top of my head.
I'm not saying these point to us living in the end times, but give me a break, we do not live in a happy happy fun time, people! Maybe the biggest crisis that middle-class American individuals face on a daily basis is where to get money for pizza (though I doubt it: divorce, layoffs, increasing debt, sick kids, all come in above that) but the world is bigger than middle-class America!
Oh, and one more thing: an ongoing theme on the ReveLife post was that "an 'all you need is love' mentality" is detrimental to Christian outreach and those who embrace it have fallen away from God and need to just read their Bible.
And to that I say, maybe you should read your Bible. "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
"...if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing."
"'Don't the bible say we must love everybody?'
'O, the Bible! To be sure, it says a great many things; but, then, nobody actually ever thinks of doing them.’" -- Harriet Beecher Stowe, Uncle Tom's Cabin
I couldn't help but think of this quote as I read the comments on a recent ReveLife article. The exact problems I was talking about last night kept cropping up.
You had two Christians arguing vehemently about whether Donald Miller was a Christian. Two more arguing over whether the inquisitions were targeted at just Christians or not, and whether or not the Crusades were justified. Several Christians were arguing rudely with non-Christians about whether or not anyone can know anything for certain.
And if you visited these people's own xangas you find comments from people from the original discussion like "You drink, swear, and have tattoos, are you sure you're a Christian?"
But probably my least favorite was a response from someone about whether we're living in the end times. They argued that we couldn't possibly be living in the end times because life was worse in WWII when everyone was killing everyone else and our biggest problem today is having enough money for a pizza party.
SERIOUSLY!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?
A pizza party is our perceived biggest problem? Not the ongoing civil wars in Africa, access to clean (or even just drinkable) water, AIDS, grain shortage, lack of adequate medical care, forced prostitution rings, child brides, slavery, terrorism all over the globe, deteriorating economic stability, the rise in orphans, the increasing number of natural disasters, culturally required genital mutilation, racism, sexism, child and spousal abuse, new developing viruses....
And those are just the ones I can come up with off the top of my head.
I'm not saying these point to us living in the end times, but give me a break, we do not live in a happy happy fun time, people! Maybe the biggest crisis that middle-class American individuals face on a daily basis is where to get money for pizza (though I doubt it: divorce, layoffs, increasing debt, sick kids, all come in above that) but the world is bigger than middle-class America!
Oh, and one more thing: an ongoing theme on the ReveLife post was that "an 'all you need is love' mentality" is detrimental to Christian outreach and those who embrace it have fallen away from God and need to just read their Bible.
And to that I say, maybe you should read your Bible. "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
"...if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing."
"'Don't the bible say we must love everybody?'
'O, the Bible! To be sure, it says a great many things; but, then, nobody actually ever thinks of doing them.’" -- Harriet Beecher Stowe, Uncle Tom's Cabin
Friday, January 16, 2009
The Protestant Church is the new Catholic Church
On my 4 hour drive home today from school I started thinking about the Catholic Church. I thought about how at one point they were the Church. They supposedly came from Peter and everything. They took the scripture literally and adhered strictly to the doctrines of communion and baptism. And then corruption came. Somewhere along the line they started spending their money poorly: on guilded crucifixs and painted naked angel babies on the ceilings instead of food for widows and orphans (in fact the gold candlesticks came straight from the widows and orphans pockets...). They decided the lay person wasn't able to interpret scripture themselves and needed someone specially trained for the job.
So the Protestant Reformation came along to fix the problem. They translated the Bible and did away with indulgences.
But now....they're really not any different. The Protestants build gigantic glass building that are beautiful but super expensive to heat. They add on big gymnasiums and auditoriums "for the community" in communities that usually already have such things. They spend large portions of the budget on elaborate costumes and special effects for the Easter and Christmas programs.
What are they doing?!?!?!
I just don't understand.
And the bickering! 5 point calvinists v. 4 pointers. Conservatives v. The Emergent. Infant baptism v. adult. Catholic communion v. Protestant.
If it's bad in the Church (and it is), it's worse between the Church and outside. The "God hates f**s" movement, abortion clinic bombers, the "psychological problems are your fault" crowd, etc. etc.
Really? Is that what Jesus thought was most important to tell the flocks of people coming to see Him? Why do we say such things? Do we just want to feel like we're better than other people? ???What on earth???
Which Jesus do you follow,
Which Jesus do you serve
If Ephesians says to imitate Christ,
Why do you look so much like the world?
It bugs me because people find out you're a Christian and immediately slap all these labels on you: "intolerant" "hater" "self-righteous" "priss" "arrogant" etc. All these things we should be the exact opposite of, but I know exactly where they're coming from.
And we're back to me wanting to just say "I'm a member of The Circle."
*sigh*
It makes me want to go live in the woods like that Blue Like Jazz guy, or with the homeless like Under The Overpass.
Do you think God ever wants to disown us?
So the Protestant Reformation came along to fix the problem. They translated the Bible and did away with indulgences.
But now....they're really not any different. The Protestants build gigantic glass building that are beautiful but super expensive to heat. They add on big gymnasiums and auditoriums "for the community" in communities that usually already have such things. They spend large portions of the budget on elaborate costumes and special effects for the Easter and Christmas programs.
What are they doing?!?!?!
I just don't understand.
And the bickering! 5 point calvinists v. 4 pointers. Conservatives v. The Emergent. Infant baptism v. adult. Catholic communion v. Protestant.
If it's bad in the Church (and it is), it's worse between the Church and outside. The "God hates f**s" movement, abortion clinic bombers, the "psychological problems are your fault" crowd, etc. etc.
Really? Is that what Jesus thought was most important to tell the flocks of people coming to see Him? Why do we say such things? Do we just want to feel like we're better than other people? ???What on earth???
Which Jesus do you follow,
Which Jesus do you serve
If Ephesians says to imitate Christ,
Why do you look so much like the world?
It bugs me because people find out you're a Christian and immediately slap all these labels on you: "intolerant" "hater" "self-righteous" "priss" "arrogant" etc. All these things we should be the exact opposite of, but I know exactly where they're coming from.
And we're back to me wanting to just say "I'm a member of The Circle."
*sigh*
It makes me want to go live in the woods like that Blue Like Jazz guy, or with the homeless like Under The Overpass.
Do you think God ever wants to disown us?
Starting Over
Ok. Well, where to start. I guess it's appropriate to start with CU since it begins there and come full circle back to it.
Sometimes I feel like CU is my heart and soul, but it's not. It feels that way because that's where my heart and soul grew the most and the best. That's where I faced trial and survived thanks to my faith, my friends, my second family. It's where I learned to be passionate about my career, about life, about God, about His people.
Sadly I think I got some separation anxiety my final semesters and, combined with some outside bad choices, I made myself disillusioned and left CU angry and bitter. And for a short while I even blamed CU, though it had absolutely nothing to do with CU at all, and had everything to do with me and God and our slowly deteriorating relationship.
Why or how or when it started deteriorating I don't know and thanks to Mike (my friend Mike, CUEMS Mike, not the one we'll get to later) I realized that, while I knew I was mad at God I had no idea why. I couldn't remember when it started or what triggered it. And I certainly couldn't think of a single time when God had wronged me, ever (duh!). In fact, even aside from salvation, He's done so much for me I couldn't believe I had ever been angry with Him. It all seems so retarded now.
I looked at my life and I realized why I was miserable: I had no life! Literally. I was angry and moody and depressed and bitter and snipey and scared and confused and completely without a center.
And I have no idea how it happened, but I got my life back. One day it was just like, snap!, back. And I felt like I did at CU again: I had hope and happiness and love and alive. I wanted all the same things I did before, I felt the call again. I knew who I was again! I was Mikki again, finally, when I never thought I'd be that girl ever again. The bubbly girl who loved medicine and loved people and wanted to scour the world for broken people to fix, she was back!
It's not easy to be that person: I want to be that person but I still feel the old crusty angry me. I feel it like rubber bands snapping into place, which doesn't really make sense except that it's sudden and painful but easy because you've released the tension. But easy doesn't make it right. In fact, it usually makes it wrong, in my experience. I want to complain about school, and be lazy in my work, and yell at people, and be snarky to the point of being cruel, and judgemental! Oh my goodness I am so judgemental. And lie. That was one of the shocking moments, to find I was lying at the drop of a hat, without batting an eye, about things that didn't matter at all! It was pathological!
So it's hard. But it's worth it, because who wants to be the angry person? And what does being that way accomplish? Yeah, it might make people notice you for a while, and maybe they'll be scared of you. But for what? I don't know. It's not what I want.
And so, yes, I wrote a really angry spiteful blog back in August. I wrote many angry spiteful things about a lot of people. And they were all wrong. I was unlucky (lucky?) enough to have used someone's actual name and get caught, and get called out on it.
So here we have it: public apology. I'm sorry for what I said. It was uncalled for. It was juvenile. It was a snap decision. I was angry and hurt and didn't think things through, and I should have. I should have thought Why am I so angry? Why do I really care what other people think? *laughs at self* I get so caught up in looking like I don't care what other people think...because I want other people to think I don't care what they think. How messed up is that?! So anyway, I'm sorry. I mean no bodily-professional-emotional etc. harm. Do I have issues with you, yes, but I have to ask myself: what's more productive? To be angry because Christians are tearing each other apart over nothing (and therefore join in on the tearing each other apart: pointless!) or be the opposite and prove the stereotype wrong? Definitely the latter. So I'm giving up.
Giving up on being angry. Giving up on trying to seem like I have it all together. Giving up on projecting an image of knowing it all. No one knows anything, come on, don't we all know at least that by now?
After all that, I'm deleting all my previous posts. Because I don't want a lawsuit, sure, waste of time and energy worrying about that. But also because I don't want people to see that awful person I was. I don't want to see that person. I want to see the person who was madly in love with Jesus. Who had a heart for the city, who voluntarily slept on ice blocks to relate to suffering Christians, who sang with her whole being in Chapel and clung to Dr. Brown's every word. Who wanted to be Dr. Brown, Dr. Cook, Steve Saint, Marilyn Lazslo, Brother Andrew.
I want more blogs like January 2006 and less like August 2008.
So, to start off with a bang, some reminders to myself:
I know you don't have the strength to fight, but do you have the faith to stand?
If every picture tells a story,
Mine must be a mystery
'Cause I lose sight of who I am and who I am
And who I'm supposed to be
Gotta be something better than just trying to survive
Gotta be some important puzzle piece that I am missing
Gotta be something more to life
I don't want to end up where you found me...
I start the day the war begins
Endless reminding of my sin
Time and time again Your Truth is drowned out by the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From you leaving me this way
Jesus can you show me
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West:
From one scarred hand to the other
No guilt in life, no fear in death—
This is the pow'r of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—
Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand.
I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned...
Yes, living, dying, let me bring
My strength, my solace from this spring;
That He who lives to be my King
Once died to be my Savior
What was said to the rose to make it unfold
Was said to me, here in my chest
So be quiet now, and rest.
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the once forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see
Christ died for men precisely because men are not worth dying for; He died to make them worth it. -C.S. Lewis
"Now, with God's help, I shall become myself." -- Soren Kierkegard
"Seems that God is looking for more ways to get us home than for ways to keep us out." –Max Lucado, When God Whispers Your Name
"As a gay man I've found it's easier for me to get sex on the streets than to get a hug in church."
"What a nation needs is not a Christian ruler in the palace but a Christian prophet within earshot."
"What He does in places around the world unknown to us is His business. And He does a pretty good job, oftentimes without our help." --Dr. Brown.
"Don't measure your life by whether you have a Jaguar or not. God is not all that impressed." --Dr. Brown.
"Do you have nothing to lose and everything to give? I'm not sure what we're holding onto." --Derek
"You may not live what you profess, but you will live what you believe." -- Dr. Brown.
"My greatest fear for you is not that you will fail, but that you will succeed at something that just doesn't matter." --Dr. Brown
"Behold, these are but the outskirts of His ways, and how small a whisper do we hear of Him!" --Job 26:14
"I will lay my bones by the Ganges that India might know there is one who cares." –Alexander Duff
"Some wish to live within the sound of a chapel bell, I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of Hell." –C.T. Studd
"If we do not go to the heathen with the Gospel, they will come to us as revolutionaries and occupation armies" --Brother Andrew, The Calling
It will often look as though Christ is defeated. That's the way it looked on Good Friday. He let himself be libeled and harassed and scorned and shoved around and killed. But in it all He was in control. "No one takes my life from Me." So it will always be. If China was closed for forty years to the Western missionaries, it was not as though Jesus accidentally slipped and fell into the tomb. He stepped in. And when it was sealed over, He saved fifty million Chinese from inside -- without Western missionaries. And when it was time, He pushed the stone away so we could see what He had done. When it looks as though He is buried for good, Jesus is doing something awesome in the dark. --John Piper, Let the Nations Be Glad
Ok, I think that's long enough ;)
Sometimes I feel like CU is my heart and soul, but it's not. It feels that way because that's where my heart and soul grew the most and the best. That's where I faced trial and survived thanks to my faith, my friends, my second family. It's where I learned to be passionate about my career, about life, about God, about His people.
Sadly I think I got some separation anxiety my final semesters and, combined with some outside bad choices, I made myself disillusioned and left CU angry and bitter. And for a short while I even blamed CU, though it had absolutely nothing to do with CU at all, and had everything to do with me and God and our slowly deteriorating relationship.
Why or how or when it started deteriorating I don't know and thanks to Mike (my friend Mike, CUEMS Mike, not the one we'll get to later) I realized that, while I knew I was mad at God I had no idea why. I couldn't remember when it started or what triggered it. And I certainly couldn't think of a single time when God had wronged me, ever (duh!). In fact, even aside from salvation, He's done so much for me I couldn't believe I had ever been angry with Him. It all seems so retarded now.
I looked at my life and I realized why I was miserable: I had no life! Literally. I was angry and moody and depressed and bitter and snipey and scared and confused and completely without a center.
And I have no idea how it happened, but I got my life back. One day it was just like, snap!, back. And I felt like I did at CU again: I had hope and happiness and love and alive. I wanted all the same things I did before, I felt the call again. I knew who I was again! I was Mikki again, finally, when I never thought I'd be that girl ever again. The bubbly girl who loved medicine and loved people and wanted to scour the world for broken people to fix, she was back!
It's not easy to be that person: I want to be that person but I still feel the old crusty angry me. I feel it like rubber bands snapping into place, which doesn't really make sense except that it's sudden and painful but easy because you've released the tension. But easy doesn't make it right. In fact, it usually makes it wrong, in my experience. I want to complain about school, and be lazy in my work, and yell at people, and be snarky to the point of being cruel, and judgemental! Oh my goodness I am so judgemental. And lie. That was one of the shocking moments, to find I was lying at the drop of a hat, without batting an eye, about things that didn't matter at all! It was pathological!
So it's hard. But it's worth it, because who wants to be the angry person? And what does being that way accomplish? Yeah, it might make people notice you for a while, and maybe they'll be scared of you. But for what? I don't know. It's not what I want.
And so, yes, I wrote a really angry spiteful blog back in August. I wrote many angry spiteful things about a lot of people. And they were all wrong. I was unlucky (lucky?) enough to have used someone's actual name and get caught, and get called out on it.
So here we have it: public apology. I'm sorry for what I said. It was uncalled for. It was juvenile. It was a snap decision. I was angry and hurt and didn't think things through, and I should have. I should have thought Why am I so angry? Why do I really care what other people think? *laughs at self* I get so caught up in looking like I don't care what other people think...because I want other people to think I don't care what they think. How messed up is that?! So anyway, I'm sorry. I mean no bodily-professional-emotional etc. harm. Do I have issues with you, yes, but I have to ask myself: what's more productive? To be angry because Christians are tearing each other apart over nothing (and therefore join in on the tearing each other apart: pointless!) or be the opposite and prove the stereotype wrong? Definitely the latter. So I'm giving up.
Giving up on being angry. Giving up on trying to seem like I have it all together. Giving up on projecting an image of knowing it all. No one knows anything, come on, don't we all know at least that by now?
After all that, I'm deleting all my previous posts. Because I don't want a lawsuit, sure, waste of time and energy worrying about that. But also because I don't want people to see that awful person I was. I don't want to see that person. I want to see the person who was madly in love with Jesus. Who had a heart for the city, who voluntarily slept on ice blocks to relate to suffering Christians, who sang with her whole being in Chapel and clung to Dr. Brown's every word. Who wanted to be Dr. Brown, Dr. Cook, Steve Saint, Marilyn Lazslo, Brother Andrew.
I want more blogs like January 2006 and less like August 2008.
So, to start off with a bang, some reminders to myself:
I know you don't have the strength to fight, but do you have the faith to stand?
If every picture tells a story,
Mine must be a mystery
'Cause I lose sight of who I am and who I am
And who I'm supposed to be
Gotta be something better than just trying to survive
Gotta be some important puzzle piece that I am missing
Gotta be something more to life
I don't want to end up where you found me...
I start the day the war begins
Endless reminding of my sin
Time and time again Your Truth is drowned out by the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From you leaving me this way
Jesus can you show me
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West:
From one scarred hand to the other
No guilt in life, no fear in death—
This is the pow'r of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—
Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand.
I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned...
Yes, living, dying, let me bring
My strength, my solace from this spring;
That He who lives to be my King
Once died to be my Savior
What was said to the rose to make it unfold
Was said to me, here in my chest
So be quiet now, and rest.
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the once forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see
Christ died for men precisely because men are not worth dying for; He died to make them worth it. -C.S. Lewis
"Now, with God's help, I shall become myself." -- Soren Kierkegard
"Seems that God is looking for more ways to get us home than for ways to keep us out." –Max Lucado, When God Whispers Your Name
"As a gay man I've found it's easier for me to get sex on the streets than to get a hug in church."
"What a nation needs is not a Christian ruler in the palace but a Christian prophet within earshot."
"What He does in places around the world unknown to us is His business. And He does a pretty good job, oftentimes without our help." --Dr. Brown.
"Don't measure your life by whether you have a Jaguar or not. God is not all that impressed." --Dr. Brown.
"Do you have nothing to lose and everything to give? I'm not sure what we're holding onto." --Derek
"You may not live what you profess, but you will live what you believe." -- Dr. Brown.
"My greatest fear for you is not that you will fail, but that you will succeed at something that just doesn't matter." --Dr. Brown
"Behold, these are but the outskirts of His ways, and how small a whisper do we hear of Him!" --Job 26:14
"I will lay my bones by the Ganges that India might know there is one who cares." –Alexander Duff
"Some wish to live within the sound of a chapel bell, I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of Hell." –C.T. Studd
"If we do not go to the heathen with the Gospel, they will come to us as revolutionaries and occupation armies" --Brother Andrew, The Calling
It will often look as though Christ is defeated. That's the way it looked on Good Friday. He let himself be libeled and harassed and scorned and shoved around and killed. But in it all He was in control. "No one takes my life from Me." So it will always be. If China was closed for forty years to the Western missionaries, it was not as though Jesus accidentally slipped and fell into the tomb. He stepped in. And when it was sealed over, He saved fifty million Chinese from inside -- without Western missionaries. And when it was time, He pushed the stone away so we could see what He had done. When it looks as though He is buried for good, Jesus is doing something awesome in the dark. --John Piper, Let the Nations Be Glad
Ok, I think that's long enough ;)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)